The Phone rings and I don’t get to it in time. I ring the number back but there's no answer.
Next a friend asks me for a favour and of course, without thinking it through, I automatically say ‘yes’.
Then I remember the new top that I bought which doesn’t fit and I need to take it back but I don’t feel very sure about it and I don’t want to deal with it.
I get cross with myself and ask, “Why didn’t I get to the phone quick enough”, “why can’t I just say “no” without feeling guilty” and “why can’t I just go up to the counter and tell the shop assistant what is wrong”. Before I know where I am I am feeling anxious and fearful and angry and irritated and all my emotions are wrapped up into this tangled bundle.
If I had paused to take a moment to think clearly…
I might have realised that if the person isn’t there when I return the call then they will likely get back to me when they are ready and if they don't then it probably wasn’t important.
I may have been able to recognise that I’m not being selfish by telling my friend I cannot help. I’m just remembering to put my own needs first.
I might realise that the worst that can happen if I take the top back is that they can refuse to do so - but nothing terrible will happen to me. No one is going to jump out of the back room and chase me!
These are examples of everyday anxieties and uncertainties for lots of people.
Decreasing your anxieties can lead towards less stress and more happiness. “Counselling can help you to discover your anxious patterns of behaviour and what your deep routed triggers might be and once you clearly define and recognise them they can be used together with other tools to decrease your anxiety.
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